Personals

WLTM: Pleasant man seeks female companion for long chats into the night via the ‘Net. Women who end up nagging all the time not need not apply. Email: ch4t2m3@hotmail.uk

HELP SOUGHT: Please help - I’ve mislaid my mobile phone and have no land-line. Ring me on 01010 54 65 54 so I can hear it. Thanks.

WLTM: Electronics-obsessed lady seeks like-minded gentleman. Let’s get together and solder as we grow older. Email: zxspec@technogrl.com.

WANTED: Top Reddit user seeks top Digg user for convenient arrangement. Let’s both upvote/Digg each others’ content and rule the Web2.0. Email: toomuchtime@haxors.com

WANTED: Lonely female Internet addict seeks partner to hide naughty dialogue in Wikipedia entries. We can talk and no-one will know. Email: lover101@hotmale.com

SEEKING: Talented male Blogger WLTM exciting female (non-blogger) companion so I have something to write about when you’re at work. Email: Mrblog@dablogblog.com

WANTED: Willing female tester to trial my latest invention - Pheramoan. Guaranteed to attract opposite sex. Just need to iron out problems with different species. Tel: 01010 00 99 00.

WLTM: Someone romantic to sync my iTunes with. Be my BiPod partner, and dance to the rhythm of life with me. Or not. Your call on 01010 467 578.

LOST: 2Gb USB Dongle. Unused, worth £30. Reward of £50 due to the bond we formed. Can be identified by the nametag on its collar - reads “Flopsy.” Tel: 01010 34 34 34.